sheafrotherdon: (Default)
sheafrotherdon ([personal profile] sheafrotherdon) wrote on May 7th, 2017 at 10:00 am
Yesterday morning I went to see Gifted, and oh, my heart. I'll say this - the plot is contrived (neither the central conflict nor resolution make a lot of sense) and some of the dialogue is clunky, but it manages to be a very sweet movie none-the-less. Chris Evans does a beautiful job of playing a father who loves his child to pieces but also wishes he had a little more time to himself, and who is also just so palpably sad throughout the whole thing that you want to bundle him up and take him home. (Luckily Octavia Spencer is there to a) own every scene she's in and b) hold his big old dirty hand when he needs it.)

But, as is a regular feature of me going to the movies, I ended up crying not just over the central storyline, but over random other realizations about my life. There's a scene (and I'm not giving anything away here) where Chris is at a bar playing a drinking game with a woman who asks him a probing question, and he looks at her for a long moment, eyes literally twinkling, and I realized . . . no one has ever looked at me that way in my whole life. And I promptly burst into tears because of about a thousand things - that bare fact; the fact that there are so few Chris Evans' in the world; the fact that there are a hundred layers of . . . hmmm, how to thread this needle. I got a glimpse, in that moment, of someone else's life. It's not mine, and I don't think it will ever be mine because of so many variables - some changeable, some not - and I love this life I have. But I imagined a different life for just a moment and it looked pretty good, too.

(And please don't tell me some version of 'you can do it!' about dating - that is absolutely not where I'm at, and not even really the point.)

Anyway, the day ended with me sitting up until 11.30 with friends on their front porch - doggedly sitting out there with blankets, because it cooled off a lot, but by god, we were determined to be outside under the lights they'd strung up before there were a lot of bugs around. We drank some good wine and chatted the evening away and it was lovely. May there be more nights like it before we hit the part of the year where doing something like that is impossible without a head-to-toe rinse in Deet.

I don't know what I want to do with my Sunday yet, which is sort of delicious. I know what I *ought* to do, but eh, I'm going with my gut today. And my gut says . . . more tea. So that's where I'm going to begin :D

Happy day, everyone!
 
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